Feelings Only Lie

A few days ago I shared that my overactive brain is often (more often then not) the biggest obstacle to progress. Feelings, Emotions and Trying to figure out what to do have been critical in the early development of our species I guess. But in my daily life they it’s a hold back, that until now kept me from being and doing what I want.

The Sedona Method helped me to be ABLE to let go of most negative and even positive emotions if I choose. Two words are critical ABLE and CHOOSE. Holding on to an unwanted emotion can feel good. Strange but for true, for me anyway. Justified anger is a perfect example of this mechanism. When someone hurts my “feelings” or doesn’t treat me like I think they should anger feels like an act of revenge. I know I’m hurting myself, but in my anger and being “right” I can’t sleep, my production is at a low and the situation eats up all of my energy. I know that when I decide to let go and accept things as they are or appear to be the whole thing will fall from my shoulders.

But it can take a while, the angry feeling tells me that the other person needs to be punished and should feel very, very bad about his behavior. Then I notice a snoring sound from the other side of the bed and this can’t be so the idiot is sleeping.  Finally I fall asleep as well wake up early still angry only to find a cheerful husband downstairs who didn’t even had a clue about all my anger.

At the same time I feel exhausted, even embarrassed and overall like being hit by a truck. So who the hell did I punish with my anger? It could even be that no harm was intended and it was my garbled perception that noticed this huge injustice. Whatever the case what I did to myself was 10 times more destructive than my husband could have done when he really was such a sh#$#%@$^% bag as I thought him to be the night before.

Really funny, the way our feelings lie to us…

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~ by barb2082 on June 16, 2009.

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