Addiction comes in many forms, it doesn’t take drugs or alcohol
We all are in one form or an other suffering from the addiction to something. A habit, an object, an idea of belief or one of the zillions of other attachments we invented. I love this message from Hale that is as usual to the point and very clear.
Here you go 🙂
Want to Stop Feeding Your Monsters?
Addictions can be monsters, but you can overcome them. The first thing to know about addictions is that all addictions are merely coping mechanisms for a set of feelings that you don’t want to deal with. All addictive behavior is medication or compensation for a set of feelings. If you deal with the feelings and let them go, the addiction falls away. I’ve seen this work even with people who are chemically dependent on a substance. But, truly, you can be addicted to anything – food, sex, professional wrestling…
I’ve seen a lot of people try to quit smoking, for instance, and they just stop. But they don’t deal with all the feelings that were motivating them to smoke. They do patches and gums and all that kind of stuff, but they haven’t dealt with the feeling they think they get from the cigarettes, and the feelings they’re smoking to avoid, so the smoking doesn’t drop away.
If you deal with the emotion that’s behind the addiction, then you can follow through with the action required to stop doing it. It’s important to acknowledge you have an addiction – many people are in denial. If you’re in denial about it, you can’t deal with it. Later, it’s really appropriate to move beyond your identification as an addict. Otherwise, you’re going to carrying that story with you.
- The first step is to acknowledge there is a problem and release until it’s okay. Now, that may seem weird, but if you can accept that you’re still okay even with the addiction, and you can even accept the addiction itself, many times that alone will cause the addiction to fall away. Since you were so upset with yourself over being addicted, you couldn’t take any action about it – you’re too busy fighting the addiction. And, if you’re at war with something, you keep it alive. As I’ve mentioned many times, when you’re at war with the mind… that’s food for the mind. So if you’re at war with your addiction, it feeds the reality of the addiction. The first step is to allow yourself to accept that’s what is here now and accept yourself that way. That’s not an end point; it’s the beginning point.
- I also recommend you stop believing the addictive voice. All tendencies have their own voice, in case you haven’t noticed. If you just simply stop buying into that voice, it loses power over you. It’s only because you’re fascinated with it that you give it your power. You can simply let go of wanting to be controlled by the addiction, or by the addictive voice.
- Here’s a process you can do with food addiction. I recommend you give yourself permission to eat whatever you want as long as you release first. That might seem odd, but a lot of people try to avoid eating a particular food. You may succeed for awhile and then you slip. Once you slip, the perfect punishment is to eat more. If you’re on a diet and you have one cookie, you may get really upset with yourself and start to feel guilty. So, the perfect punishment is another cookie… and then you feel even more guilty. Pretty soon, you’ve finished the whole box.
So, allow yourself to eat whatever you want with the pact that you’ll release first. Whatever the emotion is that’s motivating you to eat — including lust, hunger or craving — let those go. If you still want the food, let yourself have it. From time to time, you still may eat some of those foods that you shouldn’t have, but you’ll eat them less and less because you’re letting go of that motivator, the craving, or the fear, or whatever it is. Some people are fearful eaters, some people are angry eaters, some people are stressful eaters… if you let go of the motivator, the desire to overeat drops away. I’ve seen people literally – in a very short period of time – break the addiction using only that process. They simply gave themselves permission to eat whatever they wanted as long as they released first. Again, it works because each time you do that, you’re weakening whatever it is that’s causing you to overeat. And very quickly, you will lose weight that way. Okay?
~ by barb2082 on November 15, 2008.